Joke

Going to mcdonalds for a salad is like going to a prostitute for a hug

Well I never....

All these years I've thought I had a birth mark on my arse, turns out its a cigar burn.
How's about that then!!

(Dont know which one is worse)

2 irish men in a cave .... one says to the other "its dark in here isnt it".... the other replied "i dont know, i cant see"

a rabbit went into a job centre looking for a job and the lady said "your in luck, they are looking for rabbits to star in a local stage production of watership down" ..... the rabbit replied "thats no fecking good, i`m a c**ting bricklayer!"

Was in Tescos today with 2 trollies full of booze and my Xmas shopping. A little old lady got behind me in the queue.She only had a pint of milk,so I said "is that all you've got love?". She replied yes so I did the decent thing and said " If I were you I'd f**k off to another till,I'm gonna take ages.