Forum Sid Wadell Quotes - here`s some starters

"[He's] as happy as a hound-dog who's won a year's supply of Boneo."


"If we'd had Phil Taylor at Hastings against the Normans, they'd have gone home."


"When Alexander of Macedonia was 33, he cried salt tears because there were no more worlds to conquer … [Eric] Bristow's only 27."


"Look at the man go: it's like trying to stop a water buffalo with a pea-shooter."


On losing

"He looks about as happy as a penguin in a microwave."


"Bob came on like the Laughing Cavalier … now he looks like Lee Van Cleef on a bad night."


"It's the nearest thing to public execution this side of Saudi Arabia."


On feeling the pressure

"He's perspiring like a pudding in a pot."


"His eyes are bulging like the belly of a hungry chaffinch."


"His face is sagging with tension."


On silence in the hall

"The atmosphere is so tense, if Elvis walked in with a portion of chips, you could hear the vinegar sizzle on them."


"There was less noise when Pompeii was swamped in lava! Absolute pandemonium here! Barmaids are frozen like Greek statues watching! No beer's been served! Everybody's eyes [are] absolutely hooked on that board."


"You could hear a blob of vinegar drop on a chip in this hall."

You get some great Shakespeare on BBC2...

But ya cannat beat this for drama

Best one of all for me was "Thats the best comeback since Lasurus"(I don't think the spellings right)

“Bristow reasons . . . Bristow quickens ... Aaah, Bristow.

“That was like throwing three pickled onions into a thimble!”

“He's about as predictable as a Wasp on speed”

You couldn't get more excitement if Elvis walked in with a Chip Butty.

I thought he tried too hard to live up to his comeduan reputation in the latter years.

And his arse licking of Phil Taylor drove me nuts.

On a shot phil Taylor dropped over another dart into the bull.

Eat your heart out Isaac newton, that was an apple falling.


On phil Taylor nine darter

I do not believe my goggling bins (his glasses)

“There's only one word for that - magic darts!”

“Bristow reasons . . . Bristow quickens ... Aaah, Bristow.”
“Jockey Wilson . . . What an athlete.”

“When Alexander of Macedonia was 33, he cried salt tears because there were no more worlds to conquer..... Bristow's only 27.”

“That was like throwing three pickled onions into a thimble!”

“He's about as predictable as a Wasp on speed”

“Look at the man go, it’s like trying to stop a waterbuffalo with a pea-shooter”

“The atmosphere is so tense, if Elvis walked in with a portion of chips, you could hear the vinegar sizzle on them”

“Big Cliff Lazarenko's idea of exercise is sitting in a room with the windows open taking the lid off something cool and fizzy.”

“It's like trying to pin down a kangaroo on a trampoline”

“Well as giraffes say, you don't get no leaves unless you stick your neck out”

“Under that heart of stone beat muscles of pure flint.”

“He looks about as happy as a penguin in a microwave.”

“That's like giving Dracula the keys to the blood bank”

“He is as slick as minestrone soup”

“This lad has more checkouts than Tescos.”

“Even Hypotenuse would have trouble working out these angles”

“Darts players are probably a lot fitter than most footballers in overall body strength.”

“Phil Taylor's got the consistency of a planet ... and he's in a darts orbit!”

“There's no one quicker than these two tungsten tossers...”