just a quick........

JOKE
I was standing at the bar when a girl came up to me.
"Fancy buying me a drink?" She said,
"Sure." I replied. "If you let me choose."
"OK." She grinned, "But how do you know what I want?"
"Well, it's kind of a talent" I smiled, "All I do is look a girl up and down and I know exactly what drink suits her best."
"OK", she giggled. "You can choose for me." So I turned to the barman and said,
"Diet coke mate."

A man walks into a crowded bar with a loaded gun and shouts "who been shagging my wife"
a voice in the back shouts you dont have enough bullets

Paddy gets a phone call of the police "your house has been broken into,they've drank all your beer and fucked your wife!"
Paddy says "oh my god, i cant believe they fucked her after only 4 cans"

Whats the smartest thing to come out of a womans mouth?

Eintseins Belland haha!!!

...class...Little Johnny was asked by his school teacher where is Pakistan...oh..I better not

I was pretty excited when my new girlfriend sent me a text claiming she loves anal dyslexic bitch it turns out she loves alan my best mate

Tomorrow, I'm going to open up the time capsule I made when I was a kid.
I can't wait to see how big my puppy is.

The Arabian inventor of the bullet proof vehicle died today.
R.I.P Ahmed Carr

Tomorrow, I'm going to open up the time capsule I made when I was a kid.
I can't wait to see how big my puppy is.

Same can be said about your wallet mind

Someone needs to stop those tossers making TV adverts that suggest we adopt stupid animals like endangered snow leopards.

Ours has just eaten one of the kids.

Tomorrow, I'm going to open up the time capsule I made when I was a kid.
I can't wait to see how big my puppy is.

Same can be said about your wallet mind

you never stay out long enough to see it. your always tucked up in bed with your Kebab

Tomorrow, I'm going to open up the time capsule I made when I was a kid.
I can't wait to see how big my puppy is.

I went on an airplane and checked in my puppy. When they saw him at the destination, he was dead so they changed it thinking I wouldn't know. Luckily I did...






My dog was dead anyway!

Tomorrow, I'm going to open up the time capsule I made when I was a kid.
I can't wait to see how big my puppy is.

Same can be said about your wallet mind

you never stay out long enough to see it. your always tucked up in bed with your Kebab

Kate is not a kebab .............

You lot are just abnormal drinkers.............seriously, you, Bowman and Bomber are not normal

Tomorrow, I'm going to open up the time capsule I made when I was a kid.
I can't wait to see how big my puppy is.

Same can be said about your wallet mind

you never stay out long enough to see it. your always tucked up in bed with your Kebab

Kate is not a kebab .............

You lot are just abnormal drinkers.............seriously, you, Bowman and Bomber are not normal

we just thirsty thats all