O/T passport complaint.
Tue May 08, 2012 6:49 pm
Dear Sirs,
I’m in the process of renewing my passport, and still cannot believe this. How is it that Sky Television has my address and telephone
number and knows that I bought a bleeding satellite dish from them back in 1977, and yet, the Government is still asking me where I was bloody born and on what date.
For Christ sakes, do you guys do this by hand? My birth date you have on my pension book, and it is on all the income tax forms I’ve filed for the past 30 years. It is on my National Health card, my driving license, my car insurance, on the last eight damn passports I’ve had, on all those stupid customs declaration forms I’ve had to fill out before being allowed off the plane over the last 30 years, and all those insufferable census forms.
Would somebody please take note, once and for all, that my Mother’s name is Mary Anne, my father’s name is Robert and I’d be
absolutely astounded if that ever changed between now and when I die!
I apologise, I’m really pissed off this morning. Between you an’ me, I’ve had enough of this bullshit! You send the application to my house, then you ask me for my f**king address !
What is going on? Do you have a gang of Neanderthal arseholes working there? Look at my damn picture. Do I look like Bin Laden?
I don’t want to dig up Yasser Arafat, for shit sakes. I just want to go and park my arse on some sandy beach somewhere. And would someone please tell me, why would you give a shit whether I plan on visiting a farm in the next 15 days?
If I ever got the urge to do something weird to a chicken or a goat, believe you me, you’d be the last f*cking people I’d
want to tell!
Well, I have to go now, ’cause I have to go to the other end of the poxy city to get another f*cking copy of my birth certificate, to the tune of £30.
Would it be so complicated to have all the services in the same spot to assist in the issuance of a new passport the same day?
Nooooooooooooo, that’d be too damn easy and maybe makes sense. You’d rather have us running all over the f**kin’ place like chickens with our heads cut off, then have to find some arsehole to confirm that it’s really me on the damn picture – you know, the one where we’re not allowed to smile?! (bureaucratic fuckin’ morons) Hey, do you know why we
couldn’t smile if we wanted to? Because we’re totally pissed off!
Signed
An Irate Citizen.
P.S. Remember what I said above about the picture and getting someone to confirm that it’s me? Well, my family has been in this
country since 1776 …….. I have served in the military for something over 30 years and have had full security clearances over 25 of those years enabling me to undertake highly secretive missions all over the world. ……..
However, I have to get someone ‘important’ to verify who I am – you know, someone like my doctor WHO WAS BORN AND RAISED IN F**KING PAKISTAN !”
I’m in the process of renewing my passport, and still cannot believe this. How is it that Sky Television has my address and telephone
number and knows that I bought a bleeding satellite dish from them back in 1977, and yet, the Government is still asking me where I was bloody born and on what date.
For Christ sakes, do you guys do this by hand? My birth date you have on my pension book, and it is on all the income tax forms I’ve filed for the past 30 years. It is on my National Health card, my driving license, my car insurance, on the last eight damn passports I’ve had, on all those stupid customs declaration forms I’ve had to fill out before being allowed off the plane over the last 30 years, and all those insufferable census forms.
Would somebody please take note, once and for all, that my Mother’s name is Mary Anne, my father’s name is Robert and I’d be
absolutely astounded if that ever changed between now and when I die!
I apologise, I’m really pissed off this morning. Between you an’ me, I’ve had enough of this bullshit! You send the application to my house, then you ask me for my f**king address !
What is going on? Do you have a gang of Neanderthal arseholes working there? Look at my damn picture. Do I look like Bin Laden?
I don’t want to dig up Yasser Arafat, for shit sakes. I just want to go and park my arse on some sandy beach somewhere. And would someone please tell me, why would you give a shit whether I plan on visiting a farm in the next 15 days?
If I ever got the urge to do something weird to a chicken or a goat, believe you me, you’d be the last f*cking people I’d
want to tell!
Well, I have to go now, ’cause I have to go to the other end of the poxy city to get another f*cking copy of my birth certificate, to the tune of £30.
Would it be so complicated to have all the services in the same spot to assist in the issuance of a new passport the same day?
Nooooooooooooo, that’d be too damn easy and maybe makes sense. You’d rather have us running all over the f**kin’ place like chickens with our heads cut off, then have to find some arsehole to confirm that it’s really me on the damn picture – you know, the one where we’re not allowed to smile?! (bureaucratic fuckin’ morons) Hey, do you know why we
couldn’t smile if we wanted to? Because we’re totally pissed off!
Signed
An Irate Citizen.
P.S. Remember what I said above about the picture and getting someone to confirm that it’s me? Well, my family has been in this
country since 1776 …….. I have served in the military for something over 30 years and have had full security clearances over 25 of those years enabling me to undertake highly secretive missions all over the world. ……..
However, I have to get someone ‘important’ to verify who I am – you know, someone like my doctor WHO WAS BORN AND RAISED IN F**KING PAKISTAN !”
Re: O/T passport complaint.
Tue May 08, 2012 7:23 pm
Its bullshit but unfortunately I had much the same experience a couple of years ago. Married a Slovakian lady who for some strange reason wanted to have a British Passport so did all the tests, actually did a lot more and passed all the stuff to Teach English as a Foreign Language, then sent off her application. From memory she paid (yes she paid not me) around 800 quid plus some add on admin fee and shite, this is after paying for the "test" which she was shocked at.
Long story short, she got turned down as "they'd changed the rules" so I have to get involved. She was very upset as it happens, shelled out around 2k in total and had done everything by the book as far as I could see so I call the immigration people, yep those arseholes, I could not understand a word the lady on the other end of the phone said. In all fairness she tried her best "english" but to no avail, I insisted on speaking to someone more senior and another lady picked up trying to explain in very broken english that the first lady only spoke punjabi (I think, I could be wrong but that's what it sounded like) as she then said she spoke urdu? or something!! Fine, fair enough lots of folk from the Indian sub continent I thought I asked if I could speak to someone who spoke english to talk through the problem. Someone else interrupts the call and says that due to my racist attitude they were terminating the call and that any future harassment of staff would result in the police becoming involved
I was polite throughout the whole phone conversation, wife (well shorty to be ex-wife) was furious as you can imagine. She'd spent a shed full of money, mostly hers what she'd earned herself, to learn english and that gets a refund of 30 quid cos they'd changed the rules...
Now that I no longer live in the UK, when my passport comes up for renewal which it will shortly as its full of stamps, I will be required to go to somewhere in Germany
Long story short, she got turned down as "they'd changed the rules" so I have to get involved. She was very upset as it happens, shelled out around 2k in total and had done everything by the book as far as I could see so I call the immigration people, yep those arseholes, I could not understand a word the lady on the other end of the phone said. In all fairness she tried her best "english" but to no avail, I insisted on speaking to someone more senior and another lady picked up trying to explain in very broken english that the first lady only spoke punjabi (I think, I could be wrong but that's what it sounded like) as she then said she spoke urdu? or something!! Fine, fair enough lots of folk from the Indian sub continent I thought I asked if I could speak to someone who spoke english to talk through the problem. Someone else interrupts the call and says that due to my racist attitude they were terminating the call and that any future harassment of staff would result in the police becoming involved
I was polite throughout the whole phone conversation, wife (well shorty to be ex-wife) was furious as you can imagine. She'd spent a shed full of money, mostly hers what she'd earned herself, to learn english and that gets a refund of 30 quid cos they'd changed the rules...
Now that I no longer live in the UK, when my passport comes up for renewal which it will shortly as its full of stamps, I will be required to go to somewhere in Germany