why??

Allways is it the husband,father,son,who does this tragic thing?
A matr of mine,30years old did the same several weeks back,3 kids exited about being in the prem after watching the swans struggle for so long,played football on the sat,everything ok and Sunday night hung him self for no reason,,a family man,,are us guys weeker minded then women?You allways here how its the men that do this,what goes on in our brain to feel so desperate to do this,because it has to be the hardest thing to do,,

part of it is that men bottle their problems up and women dont.

part of it is that men bottle their problems up and women dont.

I think that is exactly it. I was talking with Martyn about this on Gwyn's Facebook page. Depression can be an over-used word but real severe depression is a desperately horrible thing to suffer. My friend committed suicide a number of years ago now and everything seemed fine with him and I even spoke to him just hours before he did it and he had never been happier.

I said to Martyn, I think he was so happy either because he knew what he was going to do and he felt he was about to be free of what was tormenting him or he was just over-compensating to hide his woe. I think a lot of victims of depression just feel a bit ashamed that it's affecting them so badly and it is still, unfortunately, a bit of a taboo. It's so sad because you'd like to think that nothing is serious enough to take your own life and that if they'd just talked to someone then it would have been ok but sadly many victims just see no way out.

Ultimately, I've never had depression though so can only imagine what those that suffer from it in its severity are feeling.

Allways is it the husband,father,son,who does this tragic thing?
A matr of mine,30years old did the same several weeks back,3 kids exited about being in the prem after watching the swans struggle for so long,played football on the sat,everything ok and Sunday night hung him self for no reason,,a family man,,are us guys weeker minded then women?You allways here how its the men that do this,what goes on in our brain to feel so desperate to do this,because it has to be the hardest thing to do,,

This is a very good question and I suppose as we are in 'Movember' a very timely one.

The majority of men hate the prospect of being branded a failure and sometimes the shame can bring them to taking their own lives. The trouble is men have different perspectives on what failure is. To any of us Gary Speed (or indeed your friend) might seem the complete success story, but to them their lives might be unfulfilled for some reason we don't know about.

Committing suicide in that context is not cowardly it is just a complete tragedy and one that men have lived (and died) with for generations.

part of it is that men bottle their problems up and women dont.

I think that is exactly it. I was talking with Martyn about this on Gwyn's Facebook page. Depression can be an over-used word but real severe depression is a desperately horrible thing to suffer. My friend committed suicide a number of years ago now and everything seemed fine with him and I even spoke to him just hours before he did it and he had never been happier.

I said to Martyn, I think he was so happy either because he knew what he was going to do and he felt he was about to be free of what was tormenting him or he was just over-compensating to hide his woe. I think a lot of victims of depression just feel a bit ashamed that it's affecting them so badly and it is still, unfortunately, a bit of a taboo. It's so sad because you'd like to think that nothing is serious enough to take your own life and that if they'd just talked to someone then it would have been ok but sadly many victims just see no way out.

Ultimately, I've never had depression though so can only imagine what those that suffer from it in its severity are feeling.

It sounds like your friend might have suffered with Bi-polar depression which is one of worst possible. You go from being on the ultimate high (think Chopra Swansea last minute goal) to terrible lows (think Preston 6-0) within minutes of each other, but these feelings happen tens even hundreds of times a day.

The torment that must cause is unimaginable.

Some good points ther,,but don't women feel the same,,you allways here of the man in a family never the women, ,
At the end of the day when a family splits its allways the man who feels the greater change,ie moving out,fighting to see his kids,every think is turned upside-down,were as the woman gets to stay at home looking after the kids,so very little change happens for her and women allways are ther for each other,were guys do seam to proud to ask for help,,it for sure is a womans world in many ways.
Not off course this is the case here,,