WEDNESDAY JOKE NIGHT

Geoff Shreeves - "We've got Shaun Wright-Phillips here.

Shaun, great goal today.

What does it feel like to be adopted?"

"OooooooOOOOOOOOoooooOOOOOOOOooooooooooOOOOOOoooooooooooaaaaaaaOOOOOOOOOOooOOOOOoooooooooooooooooOOOOOOOOOOOoooaaaaaa"

- Gary Neville

Shagged my first Chinese bird last night....

Mind you, shagged one, shagged em all.

Geoff Shreeves - "Fernando, you capped off the night in style with that great goal, just a shame you won't be playing in the final isn't it?"

Fernando Torres - "I wasn't booked though, Geoff."

Geoff Shreeves - "I know that, Fernando, but you're kidding yourself if you think you'll start!"

My wife called me up to the bedroom earlier, "look what I've found in a cupboard, crotchless panties" she said as she modelled them seductively. I didn't have the heart to tell her it was one of my vests!!

I keep one of Peter Pan's turds with me at all times...

That shit never gets old.

My plan to make me millions at the casino involves hypnotizing the blackjack dealer when it's his go.

I just need to get him to keep thinking of the Chubby Checker song, "Let's Twist Again."

Geoff Shreeves - "We've got Shaun Wright-Phillips here.

Shaun, great goal today.

What does it feel like to be adopted?"

brilliant!!! pissed myself fair play fella

I was taking a piss up the wall last night when a copper tapped me on the shoulder.
"What do you think you are doing?" he asked.

f**k me, he's not going to pass his Sergeants exam, is he?

I see the detective in the case of the death of MI6 spy Gareth Williams has deduced that there may be a third party involved.

This after his body was found in a holdall which had been double padlocked from the outside.

I'm no expert on policing but I'm going to guess Poirot and Columbos job are pretty safe...

I see the detective in the case of the death of MI6 spy Gareth Williams has deduced that there may be a third party involved.

This after his body was found in a holdall which had been double padlocked from the outside.

I'm no expert on policing but I'm going to guess Poirot and Columbos job are pretty safe...

Do you think they'd be involved in different cases?