bullshit deadline thread ' Have a Laugh thread '

Last deal of the night and cardiff city have re-signed the magnificent peter ridsdale

And today i awoke to find it had all been a bad dream.pikey and dale didnt get sold and im looking forward to our trip to mansfield

city signed 5 new players lastnight to get some squad depth 1min before the deadline

Eric morecombe signs for mk dons on 2hour contract

I'm in f*cking stitches at these

George Weahs cousin is on trial @ QPR. If he signs that will make him the 68th signing this window

Nookie bear just tweeted from his holiday retreat near radyr that his move to trabzonspor is back on!!

bagpuss is reported to be fooking livid after long time lover emily dumps him and joins shrewsbury town!!

rab c nesbitt spotted in luton airport munching on a dildo upside down whilst having medical at scottish outfit keith fc

the soup-dragon off the clangers is bent,but that doesn't put everton off tabling a £20m bid 4 the shirtlifter!!

Rumours have it that Emile Heskey is on his way to Balamory, although the rest of the crabs on the beach are worried he'll demand too much of the sand so are debating whether to stick him in a rock pool some where if he does arrive.

Peter Crouch is signing for my house.

Actually, never mind, it's a daddy long legs.

Andy Goram speaking to 2 clubs














At the same time
sorry

Leo Fortune-West in talks with Grange Quins.

Professor Stephen Hawking signs for Swansea City as replacement for Scott Sinclair.
Swansea scouts speaking to reporters say 'Michael Laudrup believes Hawking will be the key to Champions League football next season......or was that Championship football.......hang on......who did he say he wanted again'


BREAKING NEWS

Michael Laudrup seen tearing his hair out and threatening to quit.

ELVIS PRESLEY seen selling chips outside anfield to brendan rodgers! .... deal done in 2 mins!

Michael Owen seen in flint, standing outside ladbrookes with racing post under his arm. Refusing to join any club in the transfer window even though the whole bottom half of the prem are chasing his signature.

Jason koumas signs for the third time although it took two hours to get him out of the bookies we have signed him to sit in the stands again for a season, bums on seats as they say.

MICHAEL OWEN HAS SIGNED FOR HOLBY CITY!

cameron jerome spotted on pedalo in irish sea,believed to having talks with koreans who think he is prime minister

west hams bid to sign james corden on a free has collapsed due to excessive cake demands

fabrice muamba spotted at own funeral,in talks with charlton

santa has left the north pole and looks to be heading to premier league

santa has left the north pole and looks to be heading to premier league

Thought this was in exchange for Alan Cork.

Michael Jackson spotted outside Craven Cottage.

Saaaaake

fabrice muamba spotted at own funeral,in talks with charlton

Victor Meldrews partially deaf agent has revealed talks with Crystal Palace have broken down as they were looking to sign a new winger, not whinger.

Bob Caroljies, Greame Souness and Yosser Hughes spotted on a travellers site on the outskirts of Swansea, although Sky sources cannot 100% confirm this as yet as it every c**t in the City has a moustache.

Rumours in the North East that negotiations between a consortium including Joss Stone and Giant Haystacks and Mike Ashley are taking place over the sale of Newcastle United FC. Our sources understand the new consortium have also held preliminary talks with the FA about changing the clubs name to Jossies Giants.