Need a good CLEAN joke...

My 10 year old daughter came home from school today and said that she needs a joke to tell in front of the class tomorrow... and isn't it always the same.... when I need to think of a clean one, the only one's that pop into my head would probably make Eddie Murphy blush....

So come on gents... I know there are plenty of comedians on here, so help my daughter out with some good clean ones please...

Two cannibals eating a clown, and one said to the other...."Do this taste funny to you?"

www.kidsjokes.co.uk/ - try this?

PUPIL – “Would you punish me for something I didn`t do?”
TEACHER – “Of course not.”
PUPIL – “Good, because I haven`t done my homework.”

Read more: http://www.greatcleanjokes.com/2055/hom ... z1NU4V9tyU

whats yellow and fluffy?


Yellow fluff.

dave jones has a plan 'b'

Which message board do the most discerning, intelligent, sophisticated Cardiff supporters regular visit?















CCMB



I'm laughing so much my knickers will never dry...

Try this
SS Officer walks into to a prisoner war camp, and declares, I HAVE SOME GOOD NEWS AND BAD NEWS, First zee good news tomorrow you will all fly home, hoooooray...... now zee bad news, those of you that cannot fly... WILL BE SHOT!!!

theres no such thing as a good clean joke...as these lot have just proven

Magician on a cruise ship is constantly having his tricks spoilt by the ship's parrot, every time he performs a trick the parrot shouts "it's in his pocket" or "4 of clubs" or "it's got a false bottom". The magician cannot stand it. That night the ship gets into trouble and sinks, the magician and the parrot cling to a bit of driftwood. For four days the parrot is just staring at him silently. On the 5th day the parrot says "OK i give up, where's the ship"!

I'm here all week!

Thank you gents... certainly something to be getting on with... and gave me a few giggles in the process too

Three Irish guys watching a documentary on the teledu when Mick say to to ther two Fookin ell yer pair of coonts, we got to da some o'dat, Aye, aye, looks grand..

Off they go to pet shop to prepare...Ya got any hens yer coont, says Mick, aye got a dozen or three say the pet shop owner, well fookin put a couple in me peepar bag loike.

Seamus then asks the pet shop owner yer got any fookin parrots yer coont, aye says pet shop owner, de don't talk loike, aah dats allroight I don't want the feckers to talk, put a couple in me peepar bag loike.

Patrick, a bit worried then approaches the pet shop owner and a meekish voice asks, yer got any budgies yer fookin coont, aye got a shit load of them, you want a kebab? Nah just stick a couple in me peepar bag loike.

We're we gonna do deese dangerous sports den Mick, ah weel fook off the top of the big cliff loike says Mick.

So off they go

Mick is first being the leader, pulls two to hens out of the paper bag, puts one on each shoulder and jumps off the cliff. Splat. Arh be jesus these fookin dangerous sports arh fookin dangerous say Seamus, my turn. Seamus reaches into his paper bag, pulls out two parrot's, places one on each shoulder, then tucks his AK47 under his arm. Arh, be gesus I'll do beeter than mick the fookin coont, watch this Pat. Seamus jumps off the cliff, about have way down he takes his AK47 and blows both parrotts heads off, a second or two later SPLAT.

Patrick is getting slightly concerned about the dangerous sports and was bit concerned about his paper bag when the pet shop owner turns up..

How's it going Pat, ye oilright.

I'm a bit fooked off wid dees dangerous sports ya coont, fookin Mick got killed hen gliding, Seamus fook me with parrot shooting, gesus I tell ya I don't fancy dis budgie jumping at all.



You'll probably have to modify certain names and accent's as we don't want your daughter branded a racist at 10 years old.