Mon Jan 26, 2015 12:12 am
Team: Derby County, 2007-2008 Premiership
Overview: Derby County had finished third in the Championship the previous season, and were promoted to the Premiership after winning a playoff against West Bromwich Albion. They splashed some cash and acquired two Americans in Benny Feilhaber and Eddie Lewis (the latter of which had done very well in spells at Preston North End and Leeds United). They also broke their transfer record and acquired striker Robert Earnshaw from Norwich for £ 3.5 million. After a poor start to their season, during which time they won one out of their first twenty league matches (including a 6-0 thrashing at the hands of Liverpool, a 5-0 butt-kicking by Arsenal and that powerhouse West Ham, and a 4-1 squeaker against Manchester United), they threw around some money during the January transfer window, bringing in eight players, including midfielder Robbie Savage from Blackburn and goalkeeper and former Manchester United “legend” Roy Carroll from Rangers. Let’s be diplomatic and say that those reinforcements didn’t quite work out.
Lowlights: Based on the numbers, Derby were the worst team to ever play in the Premiership. They were officially relegated by the end of March, the earliest any team had ever been relegated in the history of the Premiership. Their eleven league points was the lowest in Premiership history. They only won one Premiership match all season, a 1-0 win against Newcastle in the middle of September (in retrospect, maybe the F.A. should investigate that match to make sure it wasn’t fixed). Their big-ticket striker, Earnshaw, scored a whopping one goal for Derby before being benched (although it as still a better return that what Newcastle got with Alan Smith) Their lone highlight of the season was getting past Championship side Sheffield Wednesday in the 3rd Round of the F.A. Cup (so what if it was in a shoot-out in a replay?) before losing in the 4th Round, 4-1, to Championship side Preston North End. They did play Manchester United tough during the reverse fixture, losing a hard-fought 1-0 battle during which time Roy Carroll made United fans wonder who the heck this guy was and what happened to the Roy Carroll they knew and loved. For manager Paul Jewell, what happened on the pitch wasn’t the only embarrassment he suffered that season.
A lurid sex tape featuring him engaged tying up and spanking a woman not named Mrs. Jewell surfaced in March, 2008. Unfortunately, this tape marked the only time anyone from Derby delivered a spanking during the entirety of the 2007-2008 season.
“Accomplishments”: Worst team in the history of the Premiership. Nearly took a point from Manchester United. Paul Jewell replaced the guy who played Screech as the person you least wanted to see in a sex tape. Let Eddie Lewis go to the L.A. Galaxy, which might have actually been a step up for him